Melancholy, The Happiness Of Being Sad
The writer Victor Hugo said that “melancholy is the happiness of being sad.” The truth is that when we feel melancholic, our mood is usually associated with sadness, although what we are remembering are good moments from the past.
Melancholy without memory is not possible. It is a feeling that reminds us that something is missing, that it was there, that it was good for us, but that we can no longer recover.
Melancholy and pain
When we feel melancholic we recall trips, moments, people or experiences and we come to think that “any time in the past was better”. Because when someone feels melancholy they are really suffering from something that they can no longer have.
Melancholy is a form of allowed pain, that is, we remember something or someone that is no longer with us. That hurts us, but it also makes us think that it is ours, that it belongs to us, even if only for a few minutes and is housed in our memory bank.
But melancholy is also a way of not accepting the present, of not being happy with what we have now. Because when we allow ourselves to travel with the mind to other places, to other spaces, to other times and we seek an unreal company, we unconsciously believe that it is something we possess and that we cannot separate ourselves from it.
When melancholy does not leave us
Melancholy occurs at specific moments, but it can become a problem when it is permanently installed in our lives. It is normal to feel melancholic one afternoon and look at old photographs; or listen to a song and remember a pleasant moment; or think of someone with whom we share our lives.
However, when this behavior is repeated frequently, if left untreated, it can lead to depression. It is, therefore, important to stop melancholy in time, recognize it and face it to prevent it from leading to a much more serious problem.
Dissatisfaction is at the bottom
Experts say that this alteration brings to light a lack that people have, that we are not happy with our lives. If our life is full, we do not feel the need to cling to the past to think that what was before was better than what is now.
Feeling more or less melancholic will depend on the degree of satisfaction we have in our present. When one is happy, one does not need to evoke past times, or think that everything could be otherwise. Anchoring ourselves in the past is a way of missing the present.
Sabina sang to this feeling. The lyrics of that song said “I live at number seven, melancholy street, I want to move years ago to the neighborhood of joy. ” The transfer does not depend on anyone, other than ourselves.
Is it always negative?
No. The melancholy, as long as it does not become chronic, also has some beneficial aspects. Melancholy, by anchoring itself in memories, what it does is, in some way, enhance memory. And sometimes it causes the information that comes to us to be processed in a more thorough way, getting us to be more objective in making decisions.
There also seems to be a certain relationship between melancholy and creativity. And it improves communication with others, since a melancholic person tends to awaken empathy. In short, melancholy, in its proper measure, is not negative.
