Money And Partner, Manage And Grow Together

Money and partner, is an issue that exceeds the way of managing. It says a lot about things like power, listening, desires, negotiating skills, and more. It is not by chance that money in the relationship is associated with conflicts, since it usually accounts for underlying and significant topics, such as difficulties in communication or trust for example. How then to approach it constructively and grow together?

Both members of the couple come from different homes, and have had different experiences. It is logical that many times they do not feel or think the same about money, each one brings their concepts, fantasies and even problems regarding it.

Several people do not feel deserving of being rewarded for their work, making it difficult for them to earn, retain and / or conveniently spend money. This logically affects the couple’s economy, being necessary to recognize the messages that the person is addressing, how the other feels about the situation, and analyze without guilt to find a way of change.

In some cases it is necessary to seek a psychological intervention, which helps to solve a condition that they suffer together and it is difficult for them to manage.

As always and as a first step, written language provides the opportunity to reflect on one’s own discourse, so putting what was agreed on paper is very useful when it comes to improving communication and seeing what each person understands about what point.

One way of managing may work for one partner and not another. The common fund modality, so popular today, may be appropriate if you share criteria for spending and saving. However, it may disadvantage one if the latter earns less than the other and they had agreed to contribute equally, or if opinions about what is necessary and what is not are very different. In these situations, separating the money and contributing together only for fixed expenses is usually more convenient.

To take into account when managing money in the couple:

* When a life begins as a couple, money ceases to be an individual matter to become a matter of two. Hence the impossibility of raising it individually.

* Honesty is also a requirement here, so hiding expenses or having money without consulting the other must be avoided.

* Agree on a time to discuss the issue, in order to reduce unexpected elements that stress and wear out.

* Maintain a calm and warm tone of voice and body language.

* Establish clearly what the budget is. Many couples spend above or below their means, because their idea of ​​the money they need to live is not as realistic as they think.

* There are multiple formulas to manage together. The most convenient will be the one that satisfies both equally.

The changes that imply an increase or decrease of the patrimony, usually mobilize the pair money and partner, until a new order is achieved. Money as an inanimate object is only the channel through which conflicts are expressed. Management and love do not have to go in opposite directions. Planning the couple’s economy, about inviting them to value the other and grow together.