Therapy For Psychologists: What Should And Should Not Be Allowed In And Out Of Consultation

Psychologists need therapy just like other people. The wounds derived from their profession, which are sometimes due to the absence of limits in therapy and outside of them, must be reviewed and, on occasions, heal.
Therapy for psychologists: what you should allow and what not in and out of consultation

Psychologists give therapy and we receive it. Therapy for psychologists represents one of the most repeated and recommended recommendations within our profession, since the one who “treats, must also be treated.”

Therapy has enormous value because precisely another professional gives you tools that you do not know how to use or do not have at the time. Obviously, the objective of this article is not to give that type of personalized treatment, but to suggest that psychologists go to therapy to talk, for example, about some of the issues that will be reflected in this article.

The objective is to show that we need therapy for psychologists both for the things that happen inside and outside the consultation due to the fact of being psychologists. Some basic questions that we should not allow our patient or a stranger in reference to our figure as a psychologist are the following.

Psychologist talking to her patient about functional analytic psychotherapy

Therapy for psychologists: what you should not allow out of consultation

One of the heaviest slabs that a professional psychologist must endure is listening to evaluations about their behavior that, about another person, would not be made. The psychologist is a professional who gives therapy. It is not the standard of good behavior either outside or inside the office. There are three simple reasons for this:

  • The psychologist only works in consultation. Just as a computer scientist does not fix computers, for example, if he is on vacation, the psychologist abandons his role as a psychologist when he leaves his work. This is the very basic thing to understand, however, outside of work, the psychologist receives consultations for advice or recommendations, something that he can do freely but is not his obligation.
  • There is not, nor will there be, “the banner of good behavior” for the psychologist in his private life. Your evaluations of how people should be is subjective, as are your evaluations of how a psychologist would be better off behaving outside of therapy. Precisely, if therapy seeks something, it is that people can live their lives as they wish. And there is no one way to do it for either patients or psychologists.
  • The psychologist should not have more psychological health than the average, just as a doctor should not have greater strength for being a doctor. Psychologists live everything the same as other mortals. However, they have a scientific background in behavioral analysis. They can evaluate, quantify and predict the behaviors of others in consultation and with the right data, not with assumptions.
  • A psychologist is not more intense, nor does he have more emotions or “inner world” simply because he is a psychologist. The psychologist is not continually analyzing others or himself. Simply, you will be able to comment on some topics with more professional knowledge if asked about it.

All these points, although obvious, have to be considered by psychologists when setting their own limits outside of therapy. However, this can be exhausting in certain environments. It is better to make the population aware of greater respect for mental health workers.

What you should not allow within the query

The therapy for psychologists should be given in relation to the things that happen to him outside and inside the consultation. For a psychologist, taking care of the therapeutic bond with a patient is fundamental. It has been shown that the relationship between a therapist and his patient / client can be as transformative as the best psychological technique.

For this reason, a therapist must take care of the relationship with his patient and know how to redefine and confront certain comments and attitudes. With this in mind, the therapy and improvement of the patient can never arise from a questioning or attack on the therapist.

There are certain aspects of therapy that should never happen and yet do:

  • Let the patient be the one who tries to carry out the therapy and not the therapist, pointing out the tests and techniques they need, because of something they have “studied” or “read before”. A patient must know the therapy he is going to receive, the patient only requests what he thinks he needs. It may be that both views of how to approach therapy coincide, but it is only the therapist who will establish tests, sessions or techniques.
  • The patient should not question the private life of the therapist at any time. It may be that the patient knows something of the therapist’s personal life and believes that he has the right to use him in therapy if he feels bad. For example, in a couples therapy, the psychologist’s marital status does not have absolute relevance, neither for better nor for worse. Crossing this line is a red zone and the psychologist must consider whether this therapeutic relationship is broken.
  • There is an error among psychologists that can lead them to empathize too much with the patient and expose their experiences in therapy as a mirror of what happens to the patient. This should be done by means of metaphors or exercises, personal revelations being something very contained in the course of therapy. It would be a limit that the psychologist has to set for himself, showing them only when they are useful for the process.
  • The professional relationship must be framed and marked. The psychologist should be a guide for the patient, not a friend. If calls or messages occur outside of therapy, the psychologist must re-explain the dynamics of their relationship to the patient. There are therapies in which there is a follow-up through calls and messages, but this should not reinforce the dependency behavior of the therapist, but rather be a reinforcement in his therapy and his long-term goals.

As we have seen, being a psychologist is something complex inside and outside the office. Knowing how to set limits is more necessary than in any other job or life situation. The therapy for psychologists should be fully implemented in our profession to help us accompany without forgetting ourselves.

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