You Can Count On Me, People Who Help Us Get Out Of The Abyss

There are people who are our lifesavers in times of distress. Those who tell us “you can count on me”, and do not hesitate to be there for us. They are wonderful beings who provide us with company and shelter.

Sometimes we need them, other times we are more independent, although we like to have their support. But what is the real role they play in our lives? Through this article we will talk about this issue. In addition, we will show what these people are like and what is said about them in current research.

What are the people who say “you can count on me” like?

Each person is unique. Those who tell us “you can count on me” could be: those who are there whenever we need it; those who, even though they are not present, give us their support; those that give us a hand, but are not available at all times.

So being able to count on someone does not mean that they are always present. It may not be; In the case of being, in addition, you can do it in different ways. For example, despite the distance, there are those who support us, even if we don’t talk to them.

These types of people could be more generous in their relationships. However, they are not because, although they provide support to the other, they respect their space. That is, they set limits. Let’s think that even professionals do it; even if it is their job, they also have their own needs to satisfy.

They can also be those people who are there for us whenever we need it. This, although it can be very “profitable” for the person who demands, it can also be exhausting for the one who gives, as they gradually give in to their own needs by being there for others.

What is its importance?

Sometimes we may think that it is not important to have the support of others. However, it is, in fact, its absence or lack can affect our health. On the other hand, we may reject the help of others; a gesture that does not necessarily have to indicate that it does not serve us.

We may refuse to accept it for other factors. For example, out of shame, or fear of accepting that we are vulnerable. However, having support can improve our quality of life.

It turns out that the human being develops in different fields. The psychosocial is one of them. It is about the scope of the bonds that we establish with others. Its importance is due to the fact that we can have greater security, feel protected, develop empathy, express what we feel, and motivate ourselves, among other factors.

In addition, the degree of satisfaction at the psychosocial level affects the other aspects of our development : physical, emotional, cognitive and spiritual. This happens because we are whole beings. Thus, having people who tell us “you can count on me” can add to improving our well-being.

Now, not all the people who accompany us with this phrase are in an effective way for us. The important thing is to have those who build healthy relationships, who provide us with support and affection while respecting those limits that we do not want them to exceed.

Why is research emphasizing this type of support?

Health is defined as ‘the state of physical, psychological and social well-being’ by the World Health Organization. Then, having links that provide us could improve it, although the other two fields are also essential.

This is being studied by various current researchers. For example, Nunes Baptista, Rigotto, Ferrari Cardoso and Marín Rueda, who published the article “Social and family support and self-concept: relationship between constructs”, in which they suggest that there are differences in terms of the perception of social and family support in men and women, and that this affects the feeling of well-being of the person, and may be related to self-concept.

Other studies focus on health and its link with social support. Lemos Giráldez and Fernández Hermida discuss this issue in their article published in the journal  Psichotema , in which they review its influence on health and suggest that social support could become crucial in the evolution of some disorders.

Having someone helps us feel welcomed, gives us wonderful support, especially in those moments when we need it. On the other hand, demanding this help does not make us inferior to anyone, it does not place us a step below any dignity. In fact, in many cases it is an exercise in intelligence and courage.

In addition, providing support can help someone who saw no way out of their problem, get ahead. Adding our hands to that person’s could change their attitude. So our words, our hugs, and other actions can expose someone who is in a deep abyss. Everything can start with the phrase “you can count on me.”